The Infrastructure’s Guide ☆ 24

Qiu Juan staggered back to his cave, his head whirling with the words: “Let's be together.”

He fled, terrified that if he stayed any longer, he would cry in front of Meng Sheng. He had never loathed his past with Kong Jia as much as he did now. Everything would have been a lot better if he had met Meng Sheng earlier.

The more he admired Meng Sheng, the more he felt unworthy of him, and that the male deserved more.

He felt a cold, wet sensation on his face. When he touched his cheek, he felt tears. He had cried! He rubbed them away, afraid that if his mother saw him like this, he wouldn't know what to say to him.

“Li’l tiger?”

Luo Cai stood at the cave's entrance, watching him, while he was still wiping away his tears.

“Mother!”

Luo knew Qiu Juan would be late because he had gone to volunteer at the food distribution today, so he fixed the lunch later. But he didn't expect him to return so late. He had gone outside the cave numerous times before, simply standing there, waiting for his son to return.

Mother Luo was about to inquire how the gathering went when he noticed his boy's slumped mood and him wiping his tears. He hadn't seen Qiu Juan cry in years. This frightened the elderly sub-female, and he rushed to Qiu Juan.

“Li’l tiger, what’s wrong? Who bullied you?”

“No, Mother. Today, the chief finally announced that Kong Jia and I had ended our relationship."

"Then why are you crying if you're free?" Luo inquired. "Did he frighten you?"

"No." Qiu Juan was hesitant to mention Kong Jia. He wasn't sure how his mother would react if he told him he'd been beaten and left alone behind.

Luo's gaze narrowed, and he inquired fiercely, "Then it was Meng Sheng who bullied you!"

Qiu Juan frowned, "Mother!”

"What did he do to you?"

Luo guessed that the two must have seen each other at the food sharing grounds. Tiger had been avoiding him for several days. Lou was worried that the male was in a fickle mood, hence after seeing Qiu Juan, he might have tried to bully him.

"Speak up, or are you trying to kill me with worry?"

Qiu Juan's eyes sunk. "He punched Kong Jia and said he wanted to be with me."

"He.. Did he really say that?" Luo's palms shook.

Qiu Juan didn't nod or shake his head.

Luo's expression was complicated. He was well aware that Meng Sheng harbored unspoken affections for his son. He had assumed that if Qiu Juan avoided him, Meng Sheng would give up. Surprisingly, it had the opposite effect.

Of course, he grasped Qiu Juan's mind, so he tentatively asked, "Then what do you think?"

"He deserves a better mate than I!” Qiu Juan responded with fury and entered the cave in despair.

Luo Cai followed, taking Qiu Juan's hand in his."Tiger, do you blame your mother for meddling with you and Meng Sheng in the past?"

This was entirely his fault. His son wouldn't be so miserable if he hadn't been so erratic and indecisive, first supporting them and then keeping a distance. He truly was an old, befuddled, and inept mother.

"Mother, what are you talking about? It's just my own problem."

"Then you're anxious about having Kong Jia's breath on you, so you think… But nothing happened between you and him. It's only a scent left by blood. Meng Sheng said he wanted to be with you, therefore he doesn't mind."

"How can there be a male who doesn't mind? Even I am disgusted with myself. Meng Sheng has no reason not to mind. The majority of the tribe has most likely forgotten the method of leaving breath with blood. Everyone assumes I was intimate with Kong Jia. In the future, how will people see Meng Sheng?"

The more he mentioned it, the more upset Qiu Juan felt. He didn't want to talk about it anymore.

Luo was aware that he was restless, so he decided to wait until he calmed down. "Stop fretting over these things. Take a rest and get some sleep. You'll feel better after a good night's sleep."

Qiu Juan agreed. He dragged himself back to his small cave, where he slept. He laid back on his stone bed, but as soon as he closed his eyes, he saw Meng Sheng's face. He quickly opened his eyes and didn't dare to close them again.

He sat up, swept the bow and arrows neatly set by the stone bed, and brushed the hemp string with his fingertips.

Meng Sheng repeatedly protected him. Encouraged him to be confident. Came specifically to find him. He made a handy weapon just for him. Despite this, he never reciprocated and even rejected him. Meng Sheng had most likely grown tired of him by this point.

He stroked his wooden bow till he fell asleep at some point.

He awoke groggy the next morning, having slept with the bow in his arms all night. When he got up, the light from outside had already reached the cave's entrance. He hadn't slept that late in a long time. He was perplexed as to why his mother had not roused him.

His head felt dizzy from sleeping for too long.

"Mom?"

Luo entered after a brief moment.

He was about to ask why he hadn't woken him up when Luo interjected, "Li'l tiger, Meng Sheng is here."

Qiu Juan, who was still drowsy, blinked confusedly before his groggy mind registered what his mother had just said and he sprang up with a startle.

"What's he doing here?"

"He came here early in the morning and asked me not to wake you. He's outside, waiting for you to wake up."

Qiu Juan pinched his index finger with his thumbnail, but the pain did not wake him from his dream. He couldn't decide whether to go out or not.

Luo tenderly stroked his messy hair. "Go ahead, li’l tiger. Mother will not intervene in whatever decision you make."

"What else will he say to me?" Qiu Juan dropped his gaze.

"Just go and find out, silly boy, he won't dare to do anything to you." [TN: Luo inside cheering, “Go get ‘em tiger!”]

Qiu Juan hesitated, but eventually marched to the outside.

The sun had climbed to the forefront of the tree, casting bright rays through the foliage and shining down. He had to blink many times before adjusting to the brightness of the outside. A dark silhouette sat on a large stone nearby, his back to him.

He walked gingerly over. Probably because he had waited too long, the male seemed lost in thoughts, thus he only reacted when he was already by his side.

When Meng Sheng returned his gaze, his eyes were bloodshot and dark, as if he hadn't slept all night.

"You're awake?" Meng Sheng's eyes brightened up the moment they met Qiu Juan's.

Fortunately, the young sub-female was still willing to see him.

“Sorry for making you feel uncomfortable by saying those things yesterday. I couldn't stop thinking about it after you left. You've just separated from Kong Jia and aren't ready to get into a new relationship right away." Meng Sheng stood up, his voice was a bit muffled, "But, could you please give me a chance? Don't reject me so decisively, and give me some time to properly pursue you. If, after some time, you still don't like me, I won't make it difficult for you, and I won't bother you again, alright?"

Qiu Juan stared silently at the male who showed both anxiety and embarrassment. He had not expected to see the male in such a state after only one night's absence. He was now utterly devoid of the spirit of the past, more akin to being insane.

He did not expect that Meng Sheng would still come to him. Rejecting a good male, in his opinion, was undoubtedly the biggest blow to the male's pride. Yet, he not only returned, but also begged in a soft voice.

He couldn't help but be touched by the words that pierced his heart. He couldn't say no, nor could he say yes.

His eyes gradually blurred: "I…"

Meng Sheng desperately added, “I genuinely like you, and not just on the spur of the moment; I want to take good care of you. If my words bother you, then you can pretend I never said them. Just don’t hide from me. Let's just go hunting like we used to, alright?”

Qiu Juan bowed his head, tears streaming down his cheeks. Why did Meng Sheng keep compromising with him, making his already painful heart tremble even more?

In this world, Meng Sheng was only afraid that Qiu Juan won’t want to see him. If that were the case, there would be no need for him to stay here.

He waited, but there was no response.

He slowly closed his eyes, his heart grew cold as he watched the young sub-female crying, head bowed and trembling.

Meng Sheng blamed himself. Kong Jia didn't even make Qiu Juan cry, but he did.

The male staggered back a few steps.

"I'm sorry I disturbed you, go back." He felt a little weak after saying these words, but that didn't mean he was going to give up.

He turned and walked into the forest, his steps heavy.

Qiu Juan felt lost when he saw the male's back and yelled, "I have Kong Jia’s breath on me!"

Meng Sheng's feet stumbled as he turned back quickly after hearing these sob-filled words.

"I've never minded it."

Qiu Juan gritted his teeth: "But I do."

Meng Sheng ran back: “What occurred in the past, Qiu Juan, is already in the past. How will you live if you refuse to let go? There are far too many days ahead of us to waste them all on regret. Do you have to torment yourself over the faults of others?"

"I don't want to," Qiu Juan sniffed.

"Will you give us a chance to forget it together?" Meng Sheng embraced the young man, whose shoulders trembled.

Instead of pushing away, Qiu Juan leaned in and sobbed into Meng Sheng's chest for a while. Only after he came to a halt did he slowly slip out of Meng Sheng's grasp: "If you change your mind, you must inform me early as possible."

Meng Sheng froze until he realized what Qiu Juan meant. For a moment, words like ‘Lost internet connection’ and ‘Internet connection found" passed through his mind.

Finally, the person in front of him was willing to give him a chance. He couldn't keep his ecstasy from overflowing in his heart. He immediately demonstrated his happiness by twirling him around. "Don't worry, there won't be a day when I'll regret it. Give me some time, and I'll show you."

"I truly don't deserve you to do so much for me, Meng Sheng. I hope you can see my flaws and understand what I'm saying."

"We all have flaws. I, too, have numerous shortcomings. I'm already grateful for the opportunity. I'll listen to you and give you anything you desire in the future."

Qiu Juan was dizzy from being held in Meng Sheng's arms, but he could truly feel the male's heartfelt delight.

He had selfishly agreed to Meng Sheng's request, but it made him uneasy in his heart.

"Don't spin me, I'm dizzy!"

Meng Sheng reluctantly let go. “Qiu Juan, you’re so kind.”

Faced with the searing gaze, Qiu Juan flushed and looked embarrassed.

"You should go back first and rest well.”

Meng Sheng touched his face. His current appearance probably resembled an abandoned wolf. Yesterday, he returned to the cave in a trance. He hadn't gotten a wink of sleep. He dashed here before dawn to see if Qiu Juan was awake. His journey, however, was not in vain.

"Well, I'll go back and tidy myself up first. In the afternoon, how about picking berries or going hunting? You make the call. I'll listen to you."

Meng Sheng's eyes shone brightly, and Qiu Juan was embarrassed to look at him.

"You should take a nap in the cave in the afternoon. We're going hunting tomorrow."

When Qiu Juan uttered "we," he hesitated, an inexplicable emotion floated in his heart.

"Yes!" Meng Sheng was very quick to agree.

"Then you go back first."

Meng Sheng nodded and walked few steps back to the cave before turning around again to see the person who he already missed.

“Qiu Juan, I'll come to you early tomorrow.”

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[TN: I think it odd that the author chose to highlight the value of virginity in stone age times. (how the breath on Qiu Juan was gained was shown as important to indicate he is still a virgin) Virginity only gained value when communities developed that used their daughters as marriage tools. Following that, virginity was linked to religions in order to better control others. If you believe that having sex before marriage makes you a sinner and dirty, you are more inclined to listen to your father, even if he wishes to marry you off to an old fart. Anyway, I bring this up because there was no hint of such a culture, and yet they cherish virginity, which is strange. Perhaps the Chinese can't imagine an alternative way of looking at this. I am descended from people who lived freer before Christianity. When two individuals chose to be together, they were expected to remain loyal; but before then, no one cared as long as there was no evidence (baby). Old songs/stories often portrayed young people having fun *wink wink* in hay bails when nobody was watching. Even nowadays, the statistics show that the majority of my people marry only after they have “evidence” XD.]